The darker shadow of that night seemed to be more in the presence of load shedding. It was Sunday quiet and tasteless dinner time.
I entered with a shopper full of spicy barbecue for meal to change the menu. Rest of the family members including my ma but apart from my pa had started to quench their hunger without me as usual, so I had to join them.
My Pa seemed to be feeling pain in his heart and it was not new for all. Because it usually was. Since he was heart patient I did not bother to ask him to join me in that spicy meal of meat. But just in a cold tone I said to him to have it with me knowing his reply in refusal in advance. My pa seemed to be in a kind of domestic tensions maybe but he was in heartache certainly.
He came again in the room where the meal was being eaten. "After dinner please recite the Holy Qur'an's verses and blow me for my pain." Said my pa.
And in return I said, "Surely" and few more words important to be said that time but not to be written this time.
None of us knew that was going to be a stormy night for our entire family. My fingers in rice, morsel in hand, while gulping down the last morsel I saw my pa falling down on the floor. I could see my bravest father weakly lying on the bed and having pen killer pill right beneath his tongue.
I hurriedly left the spicy rice on the plate and rushed towards him, put my right hand with some grains of rice on his chest and began to recite the particular prayers in Arabic. But maybe it was end of my life's first chapter under the shadow of my father's umbrella in the sun's shafts.
He picked my hand and put it on his heart and I could not easily count his fastest heart beat ever I had felt before.
It was his painful voice which made me run for arranging auto in spite of knowing that my pa would be alright when I came with auto.
But the whole scenario was changed, he was just out of his breaths, I with my younger and elder brothers got him with the help of our one of the neighbours in to the rickshaw. Horrible tragedy ever I have seen in my life!
On the way we got him shifted into an ambulance thinking that now my pa would easily be taken to the hospital alive and safe. Optimism was at its peak because I had never seen such a tragic turn of fate.
Despite my humble number of implores of reexamining my pa's cold body doctor said "Sorry" to me.
The world stopped there. It was stuffy, nothing was looking good but my father's tired body of ceaseless efforts for earning bread and butter for his family and offspring till his last breath. I could see him free from the plights of life and his belonging ones. I could see his body as relaxed as not any responsibilities were left on his shoulders.
My eyes can't help shedding tears whenever his last words whisper in my ear. It was first time in my life that I promised a person to do something. "I am junior Iqbal Abbu, don't you worry. I will fulfil your remaining responsibilities." I said. And he closed his eyes in the ambulance but not forever because the doomsday is much awaited by me to embrace him with the victory and in the gladness of accomplishments of his responsibilities that he had secretly expected from me. But by welcoming of the day of judgement his sight in my every other dream will keep consoling me.
May Allah Almighty shower his forgiveness, blessings, heaven's air upon you my father, and keep you in peaceful rest. Ameen
